Welcome Josh, yes you've found the right place, here we don't let truth get in the way of a good story.

I've always believed too that the more often you tell a story the truer it becomes, I even believe some of mine now and thats a worry.

Gotta break you out of the habit of calling them DOs though.

poddy dodger

Roadkills

Really have to share this story with you, as it is pertinent to my lifestyle…in a way.

On my way home from work one day, (yes, I was at one time legally and gainfully employed), and as we drove off the highway I saw a freshly hit deer laying there so upon arriving home, two minutes from there, I called my podnah and we met at the designated spot where we tossed it into the drainage ditch to be a tad less visible from the general public..

Now picking up roadkills can be ticklish in that your choice to grab it or leave it has to be made really fast, before the cops come by at which time they will call the game warden. The wardens are in no hurry though because they know that the longer they wait, the better the possibility that someone like us will haul off the carcass, thus saving them a job. You have to remember now that they are government employees and government employees are not supposed to sweat. Also the game wardens here are all ex-poachers who, because of their unlawful talents had been offered this soft job after the court judge sort of twisted their arms a bit. Ah, the crows…..gotta get to the animal before the crows.

So, we ‘’emptied’’ the kill and brought it to my podnah’s place and hung it in his shed and a few days later we wound up with 22 kilos of venison. We tanned the hide and I sent an email to Brigitte Bardot offering her a superbly well-tanned hide for a extremely reasonable price as the head was somewhat out of shape after losing a right-of-way to a vehicule. She never replied, so I guess that either someone else had beat me too it, or that she had enough pelts laying around as it was.


OK,. Now, if there had been several of my good ol’ boys sitting around the fire practicing our fabricating and keeping our whistle wet, the same story would have gone something like this:

‘’Hey man, remember that doe we picked up in back of my place? You know the one that weighed in a 110 kilos.’’

‘’Oh, that one, I thought you were talking about the three-legged one that my neighbour hit. Yeah, I remember it that was a big one.’’

‘’Guys I tell you this doe had just got tagged by a truck and I got the license plate number so that after we brought the deer out that I could call him and give it back to him, but I gave the paper to him (pointing to my podnah) and he lost it. Anyway just as we were loading it into the pickup, the cops came by and asked us if we had seen a deer that had been hit. Before I could answer, he ( my podnah), suddenly found the paper and gave the license plate number to the cop and said that the guy took off with it…

‘’Gimme another beer, would ya? Thanx’’

‘’Ok to continue, we brought to his place and hung it. It was so heavy that the rafter cracked, a bit of blood seeped through the floor boards and a family of raccoons moved in, and luckily we got the thing down before the coons got into the shed, because the dog next door was going wild.’’.

‘’That was on a Friday. Tuesday we skinned and dressed it. We never knew what happened but fellas, you won’t believe this, but after dressing it, we weighed out the meat and we had exactly..exactly, 100 kilos! ‘’

Strange things happen in sheds, things disappear, other things show up. The game warden showed up because of a complaint and my pod told him that the blood stains were from a raccoon which had gotten caught by the dog. Finally we convinced him of the mishap and as he left he almost forgot his steaks…..And that’s the honest truth’’

‘’Anymore beer left?…’’

Hey, Josh, have you got a pic of your shed?

& how often do you carry the empties out of your shed?

PD, I believe it.

JOSH
not sure that I would like to see that
Cheers Furphy

Quote:



beer!!!!