Australia’s Very Own Camp Oven And Outdoor Cooking And Camping Forum - Joke Of The Day

Reply #1380 - May 4^th, 2011 at 8:04am

Kez Offline
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A woman and a baby were in the doctor's examining room, waiting for the doctor to come in for the baby's first exam.

The doctor arrived, and examined the baby, checked his weight, and being a little concerned, asked if the baby was breast-fed or bottle-fed.
'Breast-fed,' she replied..

'Well, strip down to your waist,' the doctor ordered.

She did. He pinched her nipples, pressed, kneaded, and rubbed both breasts for a while in a very professional and detailed examination.

Motioning to her to get dressed, the doctor said, 'No wonder this baby is underweight. You don't have any milk.'

I know,' she said, 'I'm his Grandma,

But I'm glad I came.
Grin

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Reply #1381 - May 20^th, 2011 at 10:39pm

poddy dodger Offline
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The grim reaper came for me last night but I beat him off with a vacuum cleaner.
Talk about Dyson with death.

pd Grin

When I die I hope my missus doesn't sell my camp ovens for what I told her I paid for them. pd

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Reply #1382 - May 21^st, 2011 at 8:20am

OzJeeper Offline
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food!
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This is a true Bundy Rum Fishing Story.................

BUNDY RUM (Bundaberg Rum) Queensland’s famous product! Forget Jamaica or any other rubbish!

I finally got around to going fishing this morning but after a while I ran out of worms. Then I saw a King Brown snake with a frog in his mouth, and frogs are good bass bait. Knowing the snake couldn't bite me with the frog in his mouth; I grabbed him right behind the head, took the frog and put it in my bait bucket.

Now the dilemma was how to release the snake without getting bitten. I grabbed my bottle of Bundaberg rum and poured a little rum in its mouth. His eyes rolled back, he went limp, and I released him into the lake without incident, and carried on my fishing with the frog. A little later I felt a nudge on my foot. There was that same snake with two frogs in his mouth!

My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed. I never knew they worked.

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Reply #1383 - May 21^st, 2011 at 8:21am

OzJeeper Offline
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The secret of enjoying a good wine:

1. Open the bottle to allow it to breathe.

2. If it does not look as if it's breathing, give it mouth-to-mouth.

My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed. I never knew they worked.

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Reply #1384 - Jun 10^th, 2011 at 5:55pm

OzJeeper Offline
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food!
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A man walks into a bar and approaches the bartender, "Can I have a pint of Less, please?"

"I'm sorry sir," the bartender replies, looking slightly puzzled, "I've not come across that one before. Is it a spirit?"

"I've no idea," replies the customer, "The thing is, I went to see my doctor last week and he told me that I should drink Less."

My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed. I never knew they worked.

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Reply #1385 - Jul 15^th, 2011 at 7:48am

Little_Kopit Offline
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Is this a grace:

http://www.caregiverstress.com/2010/07/a-reminder-that-laughter-is-the-best-medi...

Blessings

Undecided

My Photo Album, featuring Labrador 2006

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Reply #1386 - Jul 15^th, 2011 at 8:38am

TBF Offline
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Little_Kopit wrote on Jul 15^th, 2011 at 7:48am:

Is this a grace:

http://www.caregiverstress.com/2010/07/a-reminder-that-laughter-is-the-best-medi...

Blessings

Undecided

A light hearted and yet honest way of giving thanks..
I enjoyed it.

Aart

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Reply #1387 - Jul 15^th, 2011 at 1:57pm

poddy dodger Offline
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Imagine living in a compound for five years with your three wives !

I have it on good authority that Osama bin Laden rang the US Navy Seals himself.

pd

When I die I hope my missus doesn't sell my camp ovens for what I told her I paid for them. pd

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Reply #1388 - Jul 16^th, 2011 at 10:43pm

Little_Kopit Offline
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http://www.youtube.com/watch_popup?v=EVwlMVYqMu4&vq=medium#t=125

Furfriends.

My Photo Album, featuring Labrador 2006

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Reply #1389 - Jul 17^th, 2011 at 1:04pm

Kez Offline
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A Scottish Wedding Grin

http://www.scotclans.com/bletherskite/?p=2868

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