You Might Be a Copper if...Sorry RT but I thought it was funny

1. You have the bladder capacity of five people.
2. You have ever restrained someone and it was not a sexual experience.
3. You believe that 75% of people are a waste of space.
4. Your idea of a good time is an armed robbery at shift change.
5. You call for a name check on anyone who is remotely friendly to you.
6. Discussing dismemberment over dinner seems perfectly normal to you.
7. You find humour in other peoples stupidity.
8. You have your weekends off planned for a year.
9. You believe the government should require a permit to reproduce.
10. You believe that unspeakable evils will befall you if anyone says ' God,
its quiet today'.
11. Whenever you phone someone, you ask them 'Are you free to speak?'
12. Your diet consists of food that has gone through more processing than a
computer can track.
13. You're the only sober person in the kebab house.
14. You believe chocolate is a food group.
15. Having alcohol at 7am seems perfectly normal.
16. You have ever wanted to hold a seminar called 'Suicide, getting it right
the first time'.
17. You believe 'Too stupid to Live' should be a valid court outcome.
18. When you mention vegetables, you're not referring to a food group.
19. You think caffeine should be available in IV form.
20. Your prisoner states 'I have no idea how I got here' - and neither have
you.
21. You end normal conversations with loved ones with Roger or Acknowledged.
22. You walk down the street looking at people as potential criminal
intelligence submissions
23. You believe the carpet bombing of certain areas of your patrol area is a viable
alternative to policing
24. You believe that some crimes can be sorted out with a damn good kicking.
25. Your favourite hallucinogen is exhaustion.
26. You are the only person you know who ever uses the word 'liaise'.
27. Your partner tells you off for walking with your hands held together
behind your back.
28. At least once every working day you use the phrase, 'The job's f****d!'
29. You regularly say, 'With all due respect, Sir' but mean nothing of the
sort.
30. You have a nose finely tuned to the smells of cannabis, decomposition and
stale body odour.
31. You think Thursday is the best night to go into town for a drink with your
mates.
32. You nodded and laughed at all of the above, and realised what a sick bunch
we all are.
All the best
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