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A Scorcher Here Today. (Read 2671 times)
 
Jan 31st, 2009 at 8:14pm

The Tree Guy   Offline
COCIA Silver Member
I Love Trees & Food.
Joined: Dec 4th, 2008 at 9:17pm
Last online: Mar 25th, 2016 at 11:10pm


Gender: male
Zodiac sign: Gemini
Posts: 89
**
 
I guess it's not only tree guys that work up a sweat.   Smiley


HOW GOD MADE AUSTRALIA,
                                             by  Bill Dettmer.


Just after the dawn of creation, the blink of an eye I guess,
God was just sat on his laurels, having a well deserved rest.
Watching the world spin before him, enjoying a packet of chips
he cursed when he noticed a large vacant lot, “oh strewth, there's a spot I've missed”.
So he focused his full concentration, which wasn't too good at the time,
reached into a cupboard marked, “plans for the Earth”, while sipping a Lager and Lime.
Scanning them over and over, whistling as he went along
he threw down his glass and swore in disgust when he realised just where he'd gone wrong.
He got all his papers together, his pencils, rulers and log.
then jumped from his place in the heavens and landed ,smack dab, in a bog.
“the first thing”, God said, “are some trees”, reaching into a bag at his side
grabbed a handful of seeds, tossed them to the breeze, which scattered them all far and wide.
Now he'd nearly used all of his animal bits to fill up the rest of the world
and not stopping to think (he was half full of ink) threw the rest in a bucket and twirled.
with one giant scoop from his mixture, he pulled out a strange looking batch.
short body, 2 short legs, 2 long and huge tail, hardly a perfect match.
He mixed till he whipped up another ('cause you can't reproduce without two.)
then stood, with a smirk, considered his work and christened them both “kangaroo”.
God whizzed back and forth to his bucket, as he mixed up a rum looking lot
time and again till he stopped, wiped his chin and said, “jeez this place is hot”.
When he'd almost emptied his bucket and was just getting ready to leave
he started to shake! he'd made a mistake! he'd forgotten the Adam and Eve!
So with all of his care and attention, with all of his love and great skill
he constructed his 'piece de resistance' then sat down to rest on a hill.
God finally got man together. Said, “sorry for taking so long”
and as sort of a birthday present, created the first pair of thongs.
beside man he fashioned a woman, with assets all of her own,
then turned his back and started to pack when they wouldn't leave each other alone.
He looked over this beautiful country of ours with all of it's paraphernalia
and cried out, “I've got one place called Heaven, so I'll call this one Australia”.


 
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Reply #1 - Feb 1st, 2009 at 8:37pm

Bird in the Bush   Offline
COCIA Gold Member
Wherever you go ... there
you are
Joined: Oct 6th, 2008 at 11:53am
Last online: Apr 26th, 2015 at 1:22am

Perth W.A., Western Australia, Australia

Gender: female
Zodiac sign: Cancer
Posts: 128
***
 
It's a cracker Tree Guy!!!

Smiley Smiley
 
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Reply #2 - Feb 2nd, 2009 at 5:15pm

skiproosel   Offline
COCIA Diamond Member
Box Monster
Joined: Jan 5th, 2008 at 6:06am
Last online: Sep 16th, 2012 at 5:35pm


Gender: male
Zodiac sign: Taurus
Posts: 2510
*****
 
Yep I agree, good read

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